The Devil on my Shoulder

And so it starts. It’s no mistaking my patterns in relationships. The first few days are either okay or amazing (with Chris is has been the later). Then we come to the point where I start analyzing the guys actions. It's like the devil on my shoulder whispering things to make things look worse then they really are.

Last night was a tense night. Chris has had a lot of stress on him with work and a trip he is planning this weekend. I felt, for the first time, that he wasn’t completely focused on the night we were spending together. So what? Everyone has an off night, right?

The trouble is, we kind left it weird too. He was leaving and by accident, left his jacket behind which triggered him to tell me that I had left some things over his place. Although he used the word “cute” to describe it, I felt horrible. I mean, we’ve only been dating a week and I have been walking on pins and needles not to do anything to scare him away. Leaving things behind is defiantly a good way of scaring guys away. (Or is my freaking out that I did leave things behind a good way of scaring a guy away?). I closed the door behind him, rested my head against the doorframe, and wondered how much longer I had to dance around what I say.

Either way, I sent a text this morning to let him know that I will meet him at the gym. I want to get a workout in before I climb and I get off earlier then he does. There has yet to be a response and I think to myself, “Maybe this is the right time to throw up a wall…or two….”

In other news, I am leaving tomorrow afternoon for Raleigh to go see one of my bestest friends! I am excited to spend the weekend with her and little Ben and I am going to enjoy getting out of Jacksonville…even if it’s just for a few days!

Updates and pictures to follow…..